Smallville “Lazarus” Review

This was the weakest premiere I’ve ever seen. Unfortunately this got another glorifying Dumb Blond line of dialogue out of Clark. Writers, Don Whitehead and Holly Henderson didn’t help things shoehorning Chloe into yet another plot when she should’ve stayed dead in the Season 3 finale,“Covenant”. They even had a second chance in “Failsday”, but the “supporting” (backstabbing) cast gets more attention than the main character (cringe-worthy)! They did get some comeuppances, though, and I liked seeing Oliver get beat up by Suicide Squad member, Rick Flagg and Chloe get driven off. I only wish she’d have gone insane putting on Fate’s helmet , but I forgot that nothing can happen to Chloe. Her worshipers call her the “heart and soul” of the show, after all. And now we have to deal with her in the comics, too.

The last conversation between Kal-El and Jor-El really felt off to me, as well, and more plot conveniences. At the end of “Abyss”, father and son saw eye to eye, and after seven years he finally called him father! Now they’re making him shady again, because it really was the producers, Brian Peterson and Kelly Saunders talking. Clark was about to wear the fucking costume and they took it away and put it in a crystal. That is more teasing to the audience, laughing at us, not building anticipation. The anticipation has been building for ten fucking years, we don’t need you dangling it in front of us like a god damn carrot.

This isn’t Batman! Where are they coming from with this “inherent darkness” in Clark? Is this because of the BS put into last season with Clark being rough around the edges, dangling Ms. Graves over the edge of The Daily Planet? And Michael, where are you??? Mackenzie Gray (who played the evil scientist from Cyborg’s centric episode) was forgettable. Rosenbaum will always be Lex for me and anyone filling in just won’t cut it.

At least there was some silver lining. Erica Durance FINALLY got second billing after Tom Welling and I liked the throw back to the pilot hanging Lois as Smallville’s Scarecrow, but there should have been more Clois scenes in this premiere. Season 10 should be about Lois & Clark, not more Chollie. It’s a pointless shipper. We all know Oliver ends up with Dinah Lance (Black Canary). Just have them get together and write him off the show. Why does it need to take years for these things to happen?

Clark even showed a little promise and I liked his determination in the beginning of the episode, smashing the tombstone and being certain that he was ready to become Superman. He had gotten his balls back there, but then they were ripped away as the premiere went on. He wasn’t being prideful. The supporting characters were once again projecting their problems on him, ego and arrogance, and it makes them all even more unlikable. Telling him he’s not doing what needs to be done, then telling him he can’t do it yet because he’s not ready (how fucking hypocritical is that?), it’s just stupid. Even Kara (who shouldn’t have been brought on to begin with) is going to come back and say he isn’t ready, stealing the spotlight with the glasses, a secret identity, stealing all of Clark’s impending thunder. Why does this show insist on making everyone but Superman look competent and successful? Honestly, if the comic book Clark Kent had this much trouble, I don’t think he’d have ever would’ve become the hero we know and love. The show has a remarkable ability of fucking up.

At least we saw Darkseid as he should look, even though I think we’re going to get some unfortunate vessel who can’t top Michael Ironside. Just watch Batman/Superman: Apocalypse to see what I’m talking about. I’m going to say Highfather was the one that brought Clark back to face the real threat, so hopefully we’ll see a little of New Genesis (Orion perhaps). This does bring up the question, though, if Season 10 will end on a high note or a low note. I’m assuming because this is the final season that it’ll end with Clark becoming Superman on a high note, as opposed to his track record of failures.

AND RAO HELP US – LET HIM FLY!

Rating: 5 1/2

Next week, look for the producers to waste an opportunity with Deadshot like they did to Roulette and Silver Banshee last season.

I liked that line about being the target, but the rest of the speech sounded lame. The upside of this is Clark back to red and blue, even though the suit was taken away by TPTB.